Caloric Happiness

I am a centrist. I belive truth can be found at the center of a twinkie, at the center of a ding dong and sometimes even at the center of a bon-bon and the taste of that truth depends on how many calories I've eaten that day and what my emotional age happens to be.

Successful On My Own

I achieve most of my goals, sometimes the world just doesn't reach them with me.

Learning Patience at a Young Age

When you were four, were you the one who could hold off eating your marshmallow with the promise of getting another one in 15 minutes, or did you eat it? (Or were you like me, who discovered that marshmellows were better after they had dried out in the bottom of the bread drawer and discovered when all the cubboards were bare and you were hungry?)

Democracy has requirements

Living in a free and democratic society does not only require that we express our voice and exert our will but that we exercise restraint, tolerance and understanding.

Constitutional Fantasies

A claim that their is a universal, absolute, plainly understood application of the Constitution to every unique and developing issue in our modern society is a fantasy that only the arrogant and dictatorial can claim to possess.

Obama and his technicolor tax coat

"Joseph and His Technicolor Dream Coat" is banned by the Mormons due to its glorification of legalized theft." Biblical Joseph, son of Jacob, head of 1 of 12 tribes of Israel, who under the pretext of a dream and a contrived furture famine, imposed 7 years of taxes in Egypt, will now be labeled the father of Obamaism... because of his totalitarian imposition of this tax and will no longer be discussed in LDS sermons.

Who needs Healthcar? Just live like a squirrel

"Have you ever seen an ugly squirrel?" Answer: No. "Have you ever seen a sick or diseased Squirrel?" A: No. "Do Squirrels have doctors?" A: No. "Do Squirrel have health care?" A: Gadnabit no! Then the Squirrel rep. from SQIRWIB asked, rhetorically, "Why are Squirrels cute, healthy and disease free," and then ...she quickly answered, "no doctors and no health care whatsoever."

Being grateful for not enough

The reality of our existence concerns the scarcity of everything, so be grateful when its just about your bald head or too few panties in your drawer.

The governmental necessary responsibility

Institutions and corporations should merit our close scrutiny as much as any government. When corporations attain too much ascendance, sometimes it is only government that truly has the muscle to restore balance. There is no PRETENSE here, but a necessary restoration of equalibrium.

Time without love is useless

"Time is subjective and the absense of love is a broken measure of its passage until a whole lifetime spills out in a handful of sand." Loren Lambert

Be your brother's keeper

"I predict future happiness for Americans if they can realize that they are their brother's keeper and that the elevation of the very least of them is the elevation of all." ~Loren Lambert~

Where are your lines drawn?

"Remember, as life has taught us, there are many fine lines and however fine they may be, they nonetheless are there, and although they may be thined, frayed, maligned and sometimes bent, they must never be crossed." Loren Lambert

Insurance companies: God, but not

"Insurance companies work in mysterious ways, just like God, except half as generous." Flight of the Phoenix, 1964

Obesity is Inherent?

A renown nutritionist stated that, "Research shows that if food is put before you, you will eat it, period, no exceptions." Is this true? I guess, what this boils down to is that we are cows and this must be considered with crafting social policy.

Tolken Tales

"Is it not a strange fate that we should suffer so much fear and doubt for so small a thing?"--Boromir of Iran. Hence, Elrond counsels, "To keep the All Seeing Eye of the Ayatollah from seizing the Ring of power, we must not just deprive him of it, but cast all the Rings forged in the bowels of Los Alamos... ...into the fires of Mt. Doom." Frodo should be arriving soon at Energy Solutions, Utah.

Innocent Ice Skating Innuendo

Young male teen commenting about Ice Dancing: "Some day I want to have a relationship with a girl like it seems with the ice dancers except without the clouthes." Gasp and laughing by parents and sibling. Realizing what he'd said he turns red and says--"No I mean the funny clothes but not like Moire Virtue."

The satisfying life of a creative man

There are only a few things more satisfying than writing a bit of work that seems to magically flow through you from the rivers of creation with a force as unstoppable and as moving as any mountain born torrent--brace for the onslaught, for if prepared, it will cleanse and renew you. And when we can't have those other bits of paradise, this is enough. Thank you for such a rich day.

Hope is the defining factor of life

"Your Quest stands on the edge of a knief. Stray but a little and it will fail, to the ruin of all. Yet hope remains while all the company is true." Galadriel of Lothlorien, to the US Winter Olympic Team.