I have a writing group that meets and we go over each others screenplays and provide feedback. It is so insightful. I had written, what I thought was a pretty good script, which was ripped to shreds.
And they were right to do so. I realize now it suffers from all the flaws they mentioned.
Sometimes I wish I had a group of close associate I could bare my soul too and be brave enough to weather the critique. It would take them hours. It would be crushing.
Yet, it's funny how critiques of the sometimes inconsequential (such as a screenplay) can seem so equally punishing. I can only imagine the hurt and betrayal I'd feel were it the book of my life.
Who do you bear your soul to? God? A spouse? Do we bare our souls to God, the wind, or the wall because we know the censure will never be as brutal as it needs to be? And if to a spouse, how many of us feel they can be trusted with such a weighty task as to provide us flowing and unfettered insight into our flaws? Will it leave us too battered and bruised to recover, or will it be a mere sprinkling of holy water meant only to flatter for fear of our lack of humility.
And if I, if we, have need to have the flaws we cannot recognize or are too self inflated to perceive of the inconsequential, how much more are we in need of that same scrutiny of our own souls? Who then and how? And where would I find the humility and the resilience to listen and to heal?
Loren M. Lambert
© August 26, 2014
And they were right to do so. I realize now it suffers from all the flaws they mentioned.
Sometimes I wish I had a group of close associate I could bare my soul too and be brave enough to weather the critique. It would take them hours. It would be crushing.
Yet, it's funny how critiques of the sometimes inconsequential (such as a screenplay) can seem so equally punishing. I can only imagine the hurt and betrayal I'd feel were it the book of my life.
Who do you bear your soul to? God? A spouse? Do we bare our souls to God, the wind, or the wall because we know the censure will never be as brutal as it needs to be? And if to a spouse, how many of us feel they can be trusted with such a weighty task as to provide us flowing and unfettered insight into our flaws? Will it leave us too battered and bruised to recover, or will it be a mere sprinkling of holy water meant only to flatter for fear of our lack of humility.
And if I, if we, have need to have the flaws we cannot recognize or are too self inflated to perceive of the inconsequential, how much more are we in need of that same scrutiny of our own souls? Who then and how? And where would I find the humility and the resilience to listen and to heal?
Loren M. Lambert
© August 26, 2014
Comments.....
Julie Stanton: Glick Eloquently said, Mitch. Many of us are too fragile of heart to bare our souls to more than just the wind or the wall. To have such a thing as a screenplay, painting, poem or project critiqued and scrutinized is hard enough. While the sting is there if our creation is ripped apart, it is merely a part of the sum of our being. But to bare our soul? Our whole life? While the need may be there for us to be critiqued and it necessary for us to grow and flourish, can we recognize the constructive criticism and remember that there are good points that still stand? Or will the blow to our soul be more than we can bear as we recall moments in our lives where we were unjustly ripped just to satisfy someone else's agenda? And who could we trust with such a task that would remain unscathed by our hurt, regardless of the love and care with which they try to bestow on us as they relate to us our weaknesses and our strengths? It has taken me years to trust myself with looking in the mirror. While I know the image I see is distorted, I have finally been able to believe in myself and my abilities. Perhaps I, perhaps all of us can rise above any injustices we had bestowed upon us by parents or former partners and realize that possibly much of what we heard from them were based on flaws within themselves and not us. As for me, I'm not courageous enough to allow anyone to scrutinize my soul-my very being. I'll just continue talking to the wind. August 26, 2014 at 5:07am
Pamela Almoustine Magee Bradford: It was really interesting to read this.... I understand completely what it is like to experience what you experienced. But here is the thing...sometimes when you have a trusted group that you know love you and value you for who you are and what you can do....and have seen what you can do, who have caught a glimpse of your future best of in the excellence of your now they will not settle, or allow you to settle, for less than. The script like your future holds a promise of greatness even if you have to slog through criticism and restarts to get to it. Be brave, be bold, be Loren and you will do fine (so will that script).
August 26, 2014 at 8:59am
Mark Gollaher: I think we sometimes want only cheerleaders from those close to us and that pressure they feel to be "on your side" can make them self edit any constructive criticism. When you a person loves you and you've also based the relationship on honesty, then a real and truly loving exploration of the faults of both parties is possible--but we have to be really willing to objective.
August 26, 2014 at 1:19pm
Loren M. Lambert: Great insight everyone. Yet, I feel like soul bearing would be beneficial in the right setting. And as a writer, I know if I would have started sooner in understanding I wasn't Twain, Dickens, London, or any of my other writing heros--I need the guidance. I need more humility. And I'll say what we say at the end of the dance class I'm taking, "I thank the earth for supporting me, the sky for inspiring me, my body for serving me and those that share the dance for supporting me."
August 27, 2014 at 11:23pm
Pamela Almoustine Magee Bradford: It was really interesting to read this.... I understand completely what it is like to experience what you experienced. But here is the thing...sometimes when you have a trusted group that you know love you and value you for who you are and what you can do....and have seen what you can do, who have caught a glimpse of your future best of in the excellence of your now they will not settle, or allow you to settle, for less than. The script like your future holds a promise of greatness even if you have to slog through criticism and restarts to get to it. Be brave, be bold, be Loren and you will do fine (so will that script).
August 26, 2014 at 8:59am
Mark Gollaher: I think we sometimes want only cheerleaders from those close to us and that pressure they feel to be "on your side" can make them self edit any constructive criticism. When you a person loves you and you've also based the relationship on honesty, then a real and truly loving exploration of the faults of both parties is possible--but we have to be really willing to objective.
August 26, 2014 at 1:19pm
Loren M. Lambert: Great insight everyone. Yet, I feel like soul bearing would be beneficial in the right setting. And as a writer, I know if I would have started sooner in understanding I wasn't Twain, Dickens, London, or any of my other writing heros--I need the guidance. I need more humility. And I'll say what we say at the end of the dance class I'm taking, "I thank the earth for supporting me, the sky for inspiring me, my body for serving me and those that share the dance for supporting me."
August 27, 2014 at 11:23pm
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