I know it's an ignorant thing to say, but sometimes I wish that more people would die of colds and flues so we'd maybe figure out a cure. I mean, we whipped all the “baduns,” journeyed to the moon, and invented microwave popcorn, why not this? I got my flu shot and still got slammed!
Let's cure these colds and flues so you and I don't have to go through this priestly ritual every so often of larynx impalement by a billion little knife-wielding viruses, waking up feeling like we got hit by a gangham-style viral tsunami, then hacking so hard we invert our esophagus. There is more fluid running through my sinuses than in the New York City sewage system. Soon, all that will be left of me is a whimpering earthworm caught too late out on the pavement in the morning sun after a rain storm, wondering if I can wiggle fast enough back into life before I dry out into earthworm jerky, or get squished in the traffic.
Yeah, yeah, I know–it could be cancer or any number of maladies that are way worse; but please just play one of your tiny little violins (just a tiny, teensy-weensy one) for me on this cold, February night – and only for a nanosecond.
Love ya.
Loren M. Lambert © February 7, 2013
Let's cure these colds and flues so you and I don't have to go through this priestly ritual every so often of larynx impalement by a billion little knife-wielding viruses, waking up feeling like we got hit by a gangham-style viral tsunami, then hacking so hard we invert our esophagus. There is more fluid running through my sinuses than in the New York City sewage system. Soon, all that will be left of me is a whimpering earthworm caught too late out on the pavement in the morning sun after a rain storm, wondering if I can wiggle fast enough back into life before I dry out into earthworm jerky, or get squished in the traffic.
Yeah, yeah, I know–it could be cancer or any number of maladies that are way worse; but please just play one of your tiny little violins (just a tiny, teensy-weensy one) for me on this cold, February night – and only for a nanosecond.
Love ya.
Loren M. Lambert © February 7, 2013
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