Friday, December 21, 2018

Fox News Hits Education Out of the Park

I learned on Fox News, from my “bud” Sean (Sean Hannity Show), that you most definitely shouldn't call an attractive woman pageant winner “hot and sexy” – at least not on national television. I was further informed that you probably shouldn't call her “beautiful and gorgeous” on national television, and that if you do, you better not do it with the same enthusiasm of a sportscaster calling the play action of a game-winning touchdown at the end of a critical NFL game (especially if you're over the age of fifty).

So guys, defy a few million years of mental conditioning. Ignore the sexy – I mean, slightly inadequately burka-ing swimsuit or skimpy dress – and practice the following phrase: "What an amazingly intelligent and compassionate woman Miss Scholarship (first), body (second), pageant queen is! Let's get her up here to ask a question."

Loren M. Lambert © January 9, 2013

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