Just so you know, I deeply and sincerely appreciate you all. There is so much I admire about most of you and always will. There’s nothing that would change that.
Throughout my life, I have held many misconceptions about many things. Fortunately, I have known individuals who were charitable and caring enough to challenge those misconceptions – without disowning me or disregarding the good in me – who have made me a better person. Why do I say this? Because I need to challenge some of you about some of your thinking. If, after doing so, you still disagree with me, I’ll still love you, and my feelings for you will not have changed.
Here it is: I have always wondered why some of you, in my private conversation with you (and sometimes even on Facebook), say things that appear to reflect bigotry, racism, and sexism in the way you react to and view the world. You may take offense to that and claim that it is merely a recognition of differences in cultures and in “the way things really are.” To a point, I agree with you that there are families, groups, cultures, philosophies, religions, and nations that have elements to them that are perverse and negative. Yet, the same has been true throughout time in all families, groups, cultures, philosophies, religions, and nations.
However, here is bigotry, racism, and sexism at its core: When the first thing out of your mouth or your communications is to attack a person, family, race, group, or nation by pointing out, either indirectly or directly, their color, race, national origin, sex, religion, or other general label (especially when it is something they have no control over, like their color, race, national origin, genetics, or sex) as a means to diminish either the value of them as a person or to criticize the validity of their beliefs or political or other philosophies – that is bigotry at its core! It is that same bigotry that leads to more serious offenses such as depriving them of dignity, liberty, property, and life because of those same immutable characteristics. Just because bigotry doesn’t arise to the level of taking another’s life does not make it any less corrosive. Simply treating another with less courtesy than you would someone else under the same circumstances, because of such superficial labels, is bigotry just the same.
Furthermore, when you mock a group of people by using the names that are used habitually among a particular race, national origin, sex, gender, or religion, in a pejorative manner, or using derogatory terms about them as also a code to denigrate their individuality or their ideas, instead of talking about the particular aspects of their ideas or elements of their culture that you believe are negative, it is, again, a demonstration of bigotry. For instance: Using a common name among a group of people, like “Pocahontas,” “Pedro,” or “Hussein;” or a label of a particular group, like “camel jockey;” or even referring to a person by a label that correctly identifies them as “Mormon,” or “liberal,” or “conservative,” or “atheist,” or “Christian,” yet is meant to thereby disqualify them from any aspect of public discourse or public commerce, is a demonstration of bigotry.
To use such labels to describe a person whom you do not like, as an end to all discussion of the individual's merit or ideas, is bigoted. Hence, if you want to talk to me about ideas, principles, elements of a culture that you find to be disagreeable, perverse or negative, then attack those things. Don’t attack a person or individual simply because of their name, their race, their national origin, their political leanings, their political affiliation, their religion, or their sex, etc. Just because somebody is a woman, a Mexican, a Muslim, etc., does not mean s/he does not share your values or that s/he has practices or ideas that are perverse or contrary to yours. Most such individuals simply have different ideas about how to arrive at the same destination toward which you are striving, and both you and they have foundational ideas that cannot be proven one way or another upon which your ideas are based. There is no political philosophy, ideology, or religion that is based solely upon ideas that can be empirically and categorically proven.
I realize that many of you may have been exposed to the worst examples of certain groups of people and that you now use them as a template to judge and evaluate all the others within that group, but I expect more of you than that. Most people everywhere, and most people even sharing radically different political philosophies, still want the same things and have the same values as you.
Understand that some people everywhere, among all people of the earth, are corrupted by aspects of the “cultures” in which they live. Attack the negative aspects of those cultures, not the individuals who are members of those cultures or groups. Take pains to view the worst example of those cultures individually and do not impute those bad examples as representing all the members of those communities.
As an example: Some of you, in private conversations with me, have referred to problems with the “black people,” as an example, as if that label explains everything about them. Some of you have had similar comments about the “Muslim people,” or the “Mexican people,” etc.
I submit that many of you, using the term, the “black people,” as an example, have never taken the time to read history, literature, works of art, and other representations about the “black people” to see things through the history that the “black people” have lived in this country. I think that some of you have no understanding of the history of America’s slavery and have no understanding of how hard it is to build a culture out of the wreckage of that heritage and legacy most privileged Americans caused on this segment of our population. Many of you engage in many racist or bigoted statements because you have no idea of what slavery was, what the reconstruction period was like in the United States, what living under the Jim Crow and segregation laws was like, what it was like to go through the civil rights era, nor what it’s like to be a member of a discriminated minority.
It is mind-boggling to me that, on the one hand, you discount and have no empathy or sympathy for the challenges that black Americans face in our country, while on the other hand, you have great sympathy and empathy for members of your own family, communities, and cities, because of the difficulties they experience in finding and keeping employment. Yet, despite the fact they have grown up in more privileged circumstances, your sympathy and empathy does not seem to extend beyond those who you see as your own. It seems you view those others as “them,” or “those people,” or “those ______” (you fill in the blank). In reality, you should have empathy and sympathy for all Americans regardless of their race, creed, or culture.
You should note that we don’t have a “black problem” in this country, as I’ve heard some of you say. What we have is an American problem that we all must resolve. Unfortunately, it is difficult even deciding what the problem is, because some of you view a culture that is different from yours (that is not inherently better, worse, negative or positive, but simply a different or neutral way of doing something) as “a problem.” All people here who are citizens, and even some non-citizens, are simply, “Americans.”
You may think that there are aspects of “Islam” that are contrary to “American values.” If that is the case, then talk about those aspects or elements of that philosophy and don’t attack the people or the individuals among that people. Don’t malign and belittle an entire group of people by simply using their name, or names, or national origin, or the label of their religion to attack.
More importantly, instead of viewing things in a negative manner, talk about the things that you hope and want for all Americans, and for all those who would hope to be Americans, or would hope to be shining examples among all nations of the world. Talk about what you want others to know and learn and do.
If you view the world from your Judeo-Christian perspective, don’t ever forget that Christians from the Dark Ages (through the 1700s and early 1800s) were tearing each other apart. Don’t ever forget that those of us who have read and believed in the Bible know that it is riddled with terrifying, horrendous stories of atrocities being committed by the predecessors of Christians against others. While such stories do not justify the acts of Muslims or any groups who use religion to justify their crimes, it nevertheless puts in context that all of humanity in all of its sectarian manifestations has had its own difficulties with religious fanatics.
The best way (the most positive way forward) is not to believe that we have a “Muslim problem.” We do not have, in this country or any other country, a “Muslim problem.” We have a human problem with people (who are criminals) who take a religion or a political philosophy and use those philosophies to justify criminal acts.
Over this past political presidential election, I have heard many people tell me, in private, that they think women should not do certain things and certainly should not be presidents of the United States. You hold this belief because you and others say that you think women, and not men, have certain attributes or issues that are incompatible with men in performing some jobs (e.g., president). So, here is my challenge to you and to those who would tell you that this is not the case: Discuss what those selected attributes or issues are, how they should or should not make a difference, how they should or should not be accommodated, and how they are or are not representative of everyone within a particular gender. In other words, don’t attack a woman just because she’s a woman. Don’t attack another person just because you think that their ideas may be wrong. Take the time to explain how and why you think their idea is wrong.
Be willing to see how ideas that certainly may have been viable 20, 50, 100, 200, 500, 10,000 years ago are not viable today. Be willing to see that while there may be differences between certain groups of people, society is better for accommodating or overlooking such differences. Be willing to see how some alleged differences are simply antiquated and misplaced prejudices, and be brave enough to recognize that we can’t let prejudice, ignorance, and bias bar our progress.
Above all, learn to judge all individuals on their own merits and not the real or imagined weaknesses, faults, or attributes of their particular origin or biological underpinnings.
Lastly, be willing to see the world as it currently is, and not as it was or as we imagine it is or should be, and work within those confines. Understand what can be retrieved and restored and what cannot, as well as what can be improved and perfected and what cannot.
With love,
Loren M. Lambert © April 17, 2017.
Throughout my life, I have held many misconceptions about many things. Fortunately, I have known individuals who were charitable and caring enough to challenge those misconceptions – without disowning me or disregarding the good in me – who have made me a better person. Why do I say this? Because I need to challenge some of you about some of your thinking. If, after doing so, you still disagree with me, I’ll still love you, and my feelings for you will not have changed.
Here it is: I have always wondered why some of you, in my private conversation with you (and sometimes even on Facebook), say things that appear to reflect bigotry, racism, and sexism in the way you react to and view the world. You may take offense to that and claim that it is merely a recognition of differences in cultures and in “the way things really are.” To a point, I agree with you that there are families, groups, cultures, philosophies, religions, and nations that have elements to them that are perverse and negative. Yet, the same has been true throughout time in all families, groups, cultures, philosophies, religions, and nations.
However, here is bigotry, racism, and sexism at its core: When the first thing out of your mouth or your communications is to attack a person, family, race, group, or nation by pointing out, either indirectly or directly, their color, race, national origin, sex, religion, or other general label (especially when it is something they have no control over, like their color, race, national origin, genetics, or sex) as a means to diminish either the value of them as a person or to criticize the validity of their beliefs or political or other philosophies – that is bigotry at its core! It is that same bigotry that leads to more serious offenses such as depriving them of dignity, liberty, property, and life because of those same immutable characteristics. Just because bigotry doesn’t arise to the level of taking another’s life does not make it any less corrosive. Simply treating another with less courtesy than you would someone else under the same circumstances, because of such superficial labels, is bigotry just the same.
Furthermore, when you mock a group of people by using the names that are used habitually among a particular race, national origin, sex, gender, or religion, in a pejorative manner, or using derogatory terms about them as also a code to denigrate their individuality or their ideas, instead of talking about the particular aspects of their ideas or elements of their culture that you believe are negative, it is, again, a demonstration of bigotry. For instance: Using a common name among a group of people, like “Pocahontas,” “Pedro,” or “Hussein;” or a label of a particular group, like “camel jockey;” or even referring to a person by a label that correctly identifies them as “Mormon,” or “liberal,” or “conservative,” or “atheist,” or “Christian,” yet is meant to thereby disqualify them from any aspect of public discourse or public commerce, is a demonstration of bigotry.
To use such labels to describe a person whom you do not like, as an end to all discussion of the individual's merit or ideas, is bigoted. Hence, if you want to talk to me about ideas, principles, elements of a culture that you find to be disagreeable, perverse or negative, then attack those things. Don’t attack a person or individual simply because of their name, their race, their national origin, their political leanings, their political affiliation, their religion, or their sex, etc. Just because somebody is a woman, a Mexican, a Muslim, etc., does not mean s/he does not share your values or that s/he has practices or ideas that are perverse or contrary to yours. Most such individuals simply have different ideas about how to arrive at the same destination toward which you are striving, and both you and they have foundational ideas that cannot be proven one way or another upon which your ideas are based. There is no political philosophy, ideology, or religion that is based solely upon ideas that can be empirically and categorically proven.
I realize that many of you may have been exposed to the worst examples of certain groups of people and that you now use them as a template to judge and evaluate all the others within that group, but I expect more of you than that. Most people everywhere, and most people even sharing radically different political philosophies, still want the same things and have the same values as you.
Understand that some people everywhere, among all people of the earth, are corrupted by aspects of the “cultures” in which they live. Attack the negative aspects of those cultures, not the individuals who are members of those cultures or groups. Take pains to view the worst example of those cultures individually and do not impute those bad examples as representing all the members of those communities.
As an example: Some of you, in private conversations with me, have referred to problems with the “black people,” as an example, as if that label explains everything about them. Some of you have had similar comments about the “Muslim people,” or the “Mexican people,” etc.
I submit that many of you, using the term, the “black people,” as an example, have never taken the time to read history, literature, works of art, and other representations about the “black people” to see things through the history that the “black people” have lived in this country. I think that some of you have no understanding of the history of America’s slavery and have no understanding of how hard it is to build a culture out of the wreckage of that heritage and legacy most privileged Americans caused on this segment of our population. Many of you engage in many racist or bigoted statements because you have no idea of what slavery was, what the reconstruction period was like in the United States, what living under the Jim Crow and segregation laws was like, what it was like to go through the civil rights era, nor what it’s like to be a member of a discriminated minority.
It is mind-boggling to me that, on the one hand, you discount and have no empathy or sympathy for the challenges that black Americans face in our country, while on the other hand, you have great sympathy and empathy for members of your own family, communities, and cities, because of the difficulties they experience in finding and keeping employment. Yet, despite the fact they have grown up in more privileged circumstances, your sympathy and empathy does not seem to extend beyond those who you see as your own. It seems you view those others as “them,” or “those people,” or “those ______” (you fill in the blank). In reality, you should have empathy and sympathy for all Americans regardless of their race, creed, or culture.
You should note that we don’t have a “black problem” in this country, as I’ve heard some of you say. What we have is an American problem that we all must resolve. Unfortunately, it is difficult even deciding what the problem is, because some of you view a culture that is different from yours (that is not inherently better, worse, negative or positive, but simply a different or neutral way of doing something) as “a problem.” All people here who are citizens, and even some non-citizens, are simply, “Americans.”
You may think that there are aspects of “Islam” that are contrary to “American values.” If that is the case, then talk about those aspects or elements of that philosophy and don’t attack the people or the individuals among that people. Don’t malign and belittle an entire group of people by simply using their name, or names, or national origin, or the label of their religion to attack.
More importantly, instead of viewing things in a negative manner, talk about the things that you hope and want for all Americans, and for all those who would hope to be Americans, or would hope to be shining examples among all nations of the world. Talk about what you want others to know and learn and do.
If you view the world from your Judeo-Christian perspective, don’t ever forget that Christians from the Dark Ages (through the 1700s and early 1800s) were tearing each other apart. Don’t ever forget that those of us who have read and believed in the Bible know that it is riddled with terrifying, horrendous stories of atrocities being committed by the predecessors of Christians against others. While such stories do not justify the acts of Muslims or any groups who use religion to justify their crimes, it nevertheless puts in context that all of humanity in all of its sectarian manifestations has had its own difficulties with religious fanatics.
The best way (the most positive way forward) is not to believe that we have a “Muslim problem.” We do not have, in this country or any other country, a “Muslim problem.” We have a human problem with people (who are criminals) who take a religion or a political philosophy and use those philosophies to justify criminal acts.
Over this past political presidential election, I have heard many people tell me, in private, that they think women should not do certain things and certainly should not be presidents of the United States. You hold this belief because you and others say that you think women, and not men, have certain attributes or issues that are incompatible with men in performing some jobs (e.g., president). So, here is my challenge to you and to those who would tell you that this is not the case: Discuss what those selected attributes or issues are, how they should or should not make a difference, how they should or should not be accommodated, and how they are or are not representative of everyone within a particular gender. In other words, don’t attack a woman just because she’s a woman. Don’t attack another person just because you think that their ideas may be wrong. Take the time to explain how and why you think their idea is wrong.
Be willing to see how ideas that certainly may have been viable 20, 50, 100, 200, 500, 10,000 years ago are not viable today. Be willing to see that while there may be differences between certain groups of people, society is better for accommodating or overlooking such differences. Be willing to see how some alleged differences are simply antiquated and misplaced prejudices, and be brave enough to recognize that we can’t let prejudice, ignorance, and bias bar our progress.
Above all, learn to judge all individuals on their own merits and not the real or imagined weaknesses, faults, or attributes of their particular origin or biological underpinnings.
Lastly, be willing to see the world as it currently is, and not as it was or as we imagine it is or should be, and work within those confines. Understand what can be retrieved and restored and what cannot, as well as what can be improved and perfected and what cannot.
With love,
Loren M. Lambert © April 17, 2017.
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