Wednesday, August 22, 2018

Stay “Dairy Fond,” My Friends

          I don't eat ice cream, often. In fact, I eat it rarely, now. However, when I’m in St. George, eating my mother’s homemade ice cream (with that extra “mom” ingredient), I almost feel like I could die at that very moment, because it’s so good—and because it’s so pretty there, in St. George!

          Then, I realize: My friends who stand with President Trump have told me that I would go straight to hell, because I am a progressive who currently leans to the left of President Trump, on some things.

          So, luckily I didn't die today. Instead, I must wait until the country puts up a rational candidate and swings back to the point I can vote conservative again, and then I can be “safe” eating my mom's ice cream in St. George and die.

          Through that scenario, I will apparently go straight to God's kingdom, where I can eat all the ice cream I want, and indulge to excess in all pleasures without being labeled a liberal, but instead will be labeled a God. Too bad you have to die to completely enjoy yourself.

          Nevertheless, I won’t forget my mom's ice cream!

Loren M. Lambert © April 2, 2017

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