Actress Catherine Deneuve said, “After a certain age, a woman has to choose between her fanny and her face.”
In a similar vein, we men have to choose between our pout and our paunch – if we even care. This is because most men have that gift of seeing, in ourselves, whatever we want to see, and most women have that gift of looking beyond our bellies to our pockets – or sometimes, in its absence, our ability to embrace our poverty in good humor.
Yes, laughter can make up for a multitude of sins, the lack of resources, and a lot of slovenliness. Don't forget that men.
I say all this because I want to whine a bit.
Here's the reality: We men have been sacrificing our faces for our bellies for far too long, so that it has become the norm. As a consequence, I can't drop five pounds without my family asking me if I have tuberculosis.
So, dear family, as you know, I've never been able to muscle-up; and it's not getting any better. My choice now is either having a cute little pot-belly or a gaunt face. I choose auditioning for actor roles as a tuberculous patient, instead of a thin, white guy with a belly. Hence, while not going back to ten pounds lighter, like last summer, I'm dropping five. It's not because I'm sick; and I don't have tuberculosis. And while I won't survive a six-month famine, I'm perfectly healthy.
Loren M. Lambert, © June 2, 2016
In a similar vein, we men have to choose between our pout and our paunch – if we even care. This is because most men have that gift of seeing, in ourselves, whatever we want to see, and most women have that gift of looking beyond our bellies to our pockets – or sometimes, in its absence, our ability to embrace our poverty in good humor.
Yes, laughter can make up for a multitude of sins, the lack of resources, and a lot of slovenliness. Don't forget that men.
I say all this because I want to whine a bit.
Here's the reality: We men have been sacrificing our faces for our bellies for far too long, so that it has become the norm. As a consequence, I can't drop five pounds without my family asking me if I have tuberculosis.
So, dear family, as you know, I've never been able to muscle-up; and it's not getting any better. My choice now is either having a cute little pot-belly or a gaunt face. I choose auditioning for actor roles as a tuberculous patient, instead of a thin, white guy with a belly. Hence, while not going back to ten pounds lighter, like last summer, I'm dropping five. It's not because I'm sick; and I don't have tuberculosis. And while I won't survive a six-month famine, I'm perfectly healthy.
Loren M. Lambert, © June 2, 2016
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